03 May Fatherhood III
Growing up was tough for me because my father was really hard on us. My father did things that are unexplainable, he was very aggressive and very abusive to my mother as well, he would hit her in public, drag her, even as far as pushing her down the stairs. There was this one time he hit my mother right in front of me for no reason I was only 14years old, I confronted him and trust him to beat the living daylight out of me, I got locked in the bathroom for 7 hours with a notebook and a pen writing “I will never confront my father again”. My father was very aggressive towards all of us. There was this time he shot at my brother at close range thank God, he missed. My father was unrepentant even till old age, it was so bad that he refused to see my sister when she was sick for a year and a half and said nothing to her till she died. My father did so many things that would have easily made me grow up to be an abusive husband and a terrible father but I took it upon myself never to be anything like him. It has not been an easy journey but I make a conscious effort every time to be the best version of myself.
I personally give kudos to those men that watched their fathers beat up their mothers and have never raised hands against any woman. Kudos to those men that were brought up by very aggressive and insensitive fathers yet still turned out to be patient and kind. Kudos to those men that their father showed no form of financial support and still come out very successful. Kudos to those men that their fathers would curse out and smash their self-esteem into shambles and still turn out as great men, amazing fathers, and loving husbands. The upbringing of a man more or less defines his future. It takes self-determination, hard work, and diligence to turn out to be a good man regardless of his abusive and insensitive childhood.
If you find yourself in any of these situations and you find it hard to overcome please reach out to someone, try to find help, call someone, see a therapist, there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. You honestly can live way better than your father.
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